Promote with pizzaBy Chris Williams. Published: 29th Apr 2002, 22:15:08 | Permalink | Printable
We love pizza. We'll do anything for it.Are you a RISC OS developer? Do you want your product promoted? Does the thought of forking out for adverts and flyers make you to go pale and weak about the knees? Although, can you afford a pizza or two?
If you said 'yes' to the pizza then drobe.co.uk is all you need. Yes, using our unique Pizza Bribe Slice System (PBSS), you can secure all sorts of plugs, favours and special articles. Depending on how much pizza you buy the drobe.co.uk team, we'll bend over backwards to get your product into the household of every RISC OS user. Refer to the table below and drop us an email if you wish to initiate a dialog and location of nearest the Pizza Hut.
- One to two slices
- We'll prioritise any news article for you, ensuring you get the most hits.
- Three to four slices
- We'll let you check the article and edit it to make your company appear in the best light. We'll also personally recommend your product and insist to our readers that their lives are incomplete without your solutions
- One whole 9" pizza
- We'll get one of your employees or one of our sufficiently biased editors to do an interview with your managing director. You get to choose the questions and answers and we'll put you up in a 5 star hotel for the night so we can discuss in style.
- Two or three 9" pizzas
- We'll remove up to 3 articles from our database for you and allow you to choose a rival company for us to slag off day and night whilst heavily promoting your company. We'll even decorate your house and look after your dog whilst you go on holiday.
- Any number of 12" pizzas
- We'll sell everything we own and become your servants. The money we make from selling off our treasured belongings and property can be used to fund your next advertising drive or a fast new car for your good self - whatever tickles your fancy. We don't care, you own us.
Disclaimer: if the pizza has tomato toppings we will instead slag off your company till the day we die. Oh and we'll eat the pizza too.
Disclaimer 2: Subject to terms and conditions. We may do none of the above.
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